How Dressing Feminine Gives You Confidence at the Gym

Learning to Balance Your Feminine and Masculine Energies

I started going to gyms when I was nineteen. It was a time when few women were in the weight room. I had masculine energy when I was younger and didn’t feel like I fit in with the women in aerobic classes. They were beautiful and slim. I felt intimidated. The women wore tight clothes with their hair and makeup done. I wore sweatpants, baggy clothes, no makeup, and my hair in a ponytail. I never envisioned myself following their patterns. I remember feeling jealous of those women and would say “Women shouldn’t be wearing makeup and dressing sexy to the gym. You go to the gym to get sweaty and work hard.” Followed by other comments of that nature. What I didn’t realize, until many years later, is that I craved being feminine and sexy like them.

The muscle heads of the gym took me under their wing and taught me the ropes of the weight room. I absolutely loved it! There was nothing more empowering for me at that time. The men would wrap my knees for support and chalk my hands for grip. I watched them load the weight onto the squat bar or leg press machine for me. An adrenaline rush would go through me as a crowd of men would surround me to watch me lift heavy weights. I will never forget the day they loaded five hundred pounds on the leg press machine. The motivating words they would say rang in my ears. “You can do this; you are one strong woman.” I sat down on the leg press machine, blood and adrenaline raging through my body. I placed my feet on the plate and adjusted my body in perfect position surrounded by about eight men cheering me on. They helped build my confidence and I knew I could do it. Suddenly, I drowned them out as they got louder and louder. I succeeded at leg pressing eight reps at five hundred pounds. It was one of the most amazing feelings of my life. I finished the lift and heard the cheering once again. They were so proud of me. I was Wonder Woman in the gym. My ego skyrocketed.

Start of My Weight Training Journey

Figure Competing

I decided at twenty-seven years old to compete in my first figure competition. I craved that feminine look but wanted to maintain a muscular look that stemmed from my masculine side. I struggled to find a balance between my feminine and masculine sides, as masculinity was generally over. Figure competing was the perfect fit. I was nervous getting on stage in that little bikini and high heels. It was completely out of my comfort zone. I could barely walk in the heels and didn’t look very graceful. But I never fell. I had my makeup, hair, and nails done, as well as a nice dark spray tan with baby oil shining me up for the stage lights. I felt so beautiful and amazing, yet intimidated and frightened. Feeling sexy was very difficult for me. Striking poses on stage is daunting, especially when you are shaking like a leaf and trying to smile naturally. I made it through, and at least, didn’t come in last place. The experience helped me grow less fearful of showing my curves and wearing tight workout clothes.

Gaining confidence in my body made me realize I would never make comments about a woman looking sexy in the gym again. I understand the importance of owning your feminine side. It doesn’t mean we are vulnerable or weak. We can be strong, sexy, and confident. Now, I only wear tight clothes, do my hair, and wear makeup daily. It makes me feel amazing. Get out of your comfort zone and try something new. Hold your head high and walk with confidence. Never give a shit about what other people are thinking. Someone will always have an opinion, whether it’s good or bad. People that speak poorly about us lack the self-confidence we’ve gained. It makes them feel better to put others down. That’s what I used to do. Life is all about lessons, luckily, I learned mine. Never judge a book by its cover.